Cleaning Up: Getting Over the Halfway Hump

Cleaning Up:  Getting Over the Halfway Hump

I'm standing in the middle of an incredible mess. 

I'm cleaning out my study.  Total excavation was necessary.  Energetic inspiration made me pull out the old bills, the empty boxes, the outdated Nead Inspiration stuff.  Taking a good look at what I need to make this work this time, maybe some containers, folders...organizational stuff.  Now I'm halfway through the job and I am horrified.

It's a sickening feeling, an almost empty study, a completely crowded hallway and the adult resolve that is needed to finish.  I can't walk away now and it makes no sense to put it back the way it was.  The way it was looks really good to me though.  Wish I hadn't started.  Halfway there and and halfway undone. 

You might be excavating something in your life.  It needed to happen.  There were situations and complications that had to unravel.  They had to be removed completely and perused and evaluated.  Sorting into piles; this commitment I will  keep.  This relationship really needs to be thrown away completely.  And over here is the networking involvement that I will retain and reuse or remediate.  At first, the process is completely engrossing.  Every time something is put to the side, a decision is made, there is freedom.  The freedom of ridding the self of life-clutter.  The positioning to make big changes.  Cleaning it out so the baggage does not come along on the journey with you.

You may be one of those people that does the "life clean up" effortlessly.  I envy you, I really do.  For the rest of us, there will be a moment when you feel as if the situation is a bigger disaster than ever. Even if it wasn't healthy, at least you know what you were doing before.  Now everything is out of place, it feels awkward and you are having that moment.  You want to go back, scrap it all, try another day.  The disaster of everything upended means you have to do something.  You are just not sure that the life clean-up is so attractive anymore.

I kept working on my study-mess.  I focused on one task and then another.  I moved, recharged, reconsidered and decided.  Eventually, I moved across the halfway line and I could see what I wanted, the well-ordered study.  A place to relax, to study, to create and to grow.  Once I conquered it, I kept going back in to celebrate the room.  It felt so good, not just because it was cleaned out, but because I had overcome the challenge.  I hadn't given up.

Life and study areas.  They are not so different.  Keep going.  Picture what it will look like.  Imagine the satisfaction that comes from healthy relationships, from financial order, from a sense of purpose.  Let that picture, the purpose of cleaning stuff up, drive your actions and energy.  See yourself sitting in your favorite spot with less stress and more amazement.

Persist!  Get over the hump!  It will be worth it.

If you enjoyed this blog, please utilize the other resources at http://www.neadinspiration.com/ and listen to Liz's radio show at http://www.desmoineslocallive.com/ called "Skywalk Talk," from 11:00-12:30 cst, M-F. Liz Nead is committed to helping you succeed!

Don't Freeze the Past: Embrace Today!

Don't Freeze in the Past: Embrace Today!

It's holiday time and in regular form I travelled back to Minnesota for a wedding, my cousin David's wedding. I wound around Highway 35, sliced through St. Paul on 90 and then swung through White Bear and Vadnais Heights and Maplewood on 694 before slowing down to catch Lexington Avenue. Only a few miles down Lexington and I could see myself, the "myself" of the past. There she is...in seventh grade, running her five mile loop. There she is when she got her first job. There is where she got her first speeding ticket. Then, the street of my personal definition, where it all began, Lake Oaks Drive.

My husband turned in and I felt strange, aptly middle-named-Alice in Wonderland- yes my middle name is Alice. What happened to these trees? Why are they so tall and thick-branched? Why are the houses somehow different, longer, grayer? the lake at the end of the road is obscure, hidden. The sky looks smaller, the road narrower.

This is not the Lake Oaks Drive of my past.

I say this to my husband and he continues on silently. He has other things on his mind, the things that would occur to a husband drawing even closer to his in-laws. I sense the internal eye-roll, a skill picked up after ten years of marriage. I think I say this every time we direct the car this way, but I am surprised every time. It is not the Lake Oaks Drive of my youth, of thirty years ago. It is 2009, and everything has changed.

I have been that street, a snapshot that is stuck in the mind's eye of another. No matter how hard I try, I am always who I was twenty years ago, ten years ago, whenever that moment became so definitive that it cannot be forgotten. Sometimes it is a moment of beauty, a race won, a record broken. The mind might capture a special moment of childhood friendship or a the first blush of romance before it is tainted by expectations.

Or, the snapshot can be a picture of a darker moment, an instance when I hurt another, when I betrayed someone, when I disappointed, when I fell short of expected greatness. Often no one knows when the button is pushed on the memory camera, but when it happens, it becomes a photograph. A picture of the truth. The truth of one moment in a lifetime.

Lake Oaks Drive and I, we are sisters. No matter how hard I try, I cannot escape their surprise. Oh Liz, you have changed! You are no longer that unsure girl, that reckless woman, that foolhardy professional. But that is what I remember, it is so hard for me to see you this way, to think that it is REAL.

You know what I mean. You have snapshots, frozen memories of people. I say this to you. Let them grow. Let them change. Maybe they are not as perfect as you thought they were. Perhaps they are not as manipulative as you remember. Operative word: remember. Those days are gone. Familiarize yourself with the present. See who is here now, today. Let each person be who they are, NOW. Don't freeze them as your own personal Lake Oaks Drive. The poetic curve of the oaks, the history of the homes added-on, the worn streets are more beautiful than they were 30 years ago. Allow change.

Embrace today.

If you enjoyed this blog, please utilize the other resources at http://www.neadinspiration.com/ and listen to Liz's radio show at http://www.desmoineslocallive.com/ called "Skywalk Talk," from 11:00-12:30 cst, M-F. Liz Nead is committed to helping you succeed!

Want More Happiness? The choice is yours!

Want More Happiness? The choice is yours!

(Check out Liz Nead's video at the bottom talking about your choice for happiess!)

Do you remember your parents lecturing you, telling you to eat your broccoli, that there were children that would beg for broccoli? Have you ever told yourself to be grateful, to stop complaining, that your life as bad as others, that you have no right to complain?

Does it work? Does it make you feel thankful for what you have right now? Of course not!

Sure, you might be grateful for a few moments, as you notice your blessings, your fortunate circumstances. Most of the time, though, it doesn’t take long before something else grabs your attention. Your eyes and mind turn to what you want, what you don’t have, what you wish for.

If you are not this person, you have known something like this. Someone who just can’t focus on what they have. It is always about what could be better. There is always a wrong to glimpse. A spoiler to ruin what could be a positive existence.

You will face both pleasant circumstances and challenging situations. Sometimes life will seem easy and in other moments life will be hard for you. No matter what you think about the greener grass on the other side of the fence surrounding your world, it is the same for everyone. You only have to dig to find the sameness of conditions.

The only difference between you and the rest of the world is your perspective. Yes, there are places that are not fun because of war, poverty, lack of education and oppressive leadership. Of course if you live in a cute little house in the suburbs, it would be a preferable situation to the woman who lives in a mud hut in Tanzania without running water or state of the art medical care. You would be surprised at what your Tanzanian friend might say about your food, your home, your world. You prefer it because you know it.

Your happiness will not come from looking at someone else and telling yourself you have it good. You cannot sooth your soul by reminding yourself of the people in another country who don’t have what you have. You won’t appreciate your healthy children more by seeing unhealthy children. You won’t love your home more if you go to a smaller home. Those perspectives are temporary. The antidote to “comparative happiness” is to go to a bigger house, better kids, a nice place to live and suddenly you will feel irritated and underserved.

No, the best way to grab the happiness that is yours is to choose happiness. To choose to look at your husband and see what you love. To allow yourself to enjoy your friends instead of wishing for something better. To touch the softness of your well-worn couch and choose to remember good memories. To make a point of remember good times not bad times.

I promise if you choose to see and give credit to the good in any situation, you will find your heart full of gratitude for what you have. And you will ask yourself, grass? What grass? I love my life. It is mine.

If you enjoyed this blog, please enjoy the other resources at www.neadinspiration.com and listen to Liz's radio show at www.desmoineslocallive.com called "Skywalk Talk," from 11:00 to 12:30 cst, M-F. Liz wants to help you succeed!

Jealousy...it's not such a bad thing!

Jealousy...it's not such a bad thing!

I felt a pang of jealously recently. I got my shot of jealousy from a usual source. Facebook is a place for people to show the shiny success of their life without betraying themselves with eye contact. Even though I understand the easy falsehood of social networking, I still felt it. That person was going to do something I have always wanted to do. I’m known for wanting it. If she reads this, she’ll know what I’m talking about. And it was not going to be me that did it first. It would be her. Jealousy. Gross.

The stomach turning feeling of wanting something that someone has is not due to any sort of systemic distaste for my own life. My existence is a wild ride, taking me from a career that used 25% of my talents and required 75% of my energy pretending to be something I’m not. Each day, I leap out of bed and I wonder, what will happen next? What serendipity is going to deliver me another phase of my dream? It’s like being passed a really great note from God in class.

All this sounds good, right? How could I be jealous when I am so excited about what is going to happen next?

The initial knee-jerk reaction to the adult on-set of jealousy is to take two pills. One is a pill of gratitude (get it together and start being thankful for what you have). The other is a little shot of denial. You can’t be jealous, that would be make you downright pathetic.

Jealousy, that thing that makes you want what something else has, isn’t to be exorcised. It should be examined because it is a sign. A sign that what you have is not enough. It could be that you are insecure about something. Or perhaps the jealousy is showcasing a need for you to DO something. In my case, I had not done the work to accomplish what this other person had done. So whose fault was it that she had reached the finish line first? It could be telling you that the life that you have is not enough and you need to expand your perspective and your reach to more fully challenge your talents, your tolerance for risk, your experience.

Don’t push off jealousy as a phase or a sign of weakness. Figure out what is it telling you and do what you need to do. That other person may have something you want. Go and get it for yourself. Change what you need to change, move where you need to move and face the fears in front of you.

Maybe then you can focus on what YOU are doing, instead of what someone else is experiencing. I guarantee it will be more fun.

For more helpful resources, go to www.neadinspiration.com or e-mail Liz’s team at neadinspiration@aol.com. Change Your Vision, Change Your Life!

Does what you think really matter?

Does what you think really matter?

I am married to the diametric opposite of me. He would term his orientation as realistic but I am not so sure. He seems genuinely suprised and delighted each time something wonderful happens to him. And, he is also grimly accepting and unsurprised when the events of the day went south.

In many ways, he has been more successful than me. Financially responsible, world traveller, speaker of more than one language, seemingly able to do anything he puts his mind to, it doesn't seem he should have such a darkened perspective. I have not been so careful skipping along the path of my life. While I have the abilities to make anything happen, I have not. I have not travelled the world over. I never put my mind to learning another language and I would never, under any circumstances classify my past behavior as fiscally responsible.

It makes me sad when he sees life as half of what it should be. I work on him, day after day, in the last ten years of our relationship. I curl up in hurt as he views ten days of bad behavior as more powerful than the remaining loving ones we have shared. He looks at me with disbelieving eyes. Why should I, he asks, change the way I think. I hear his unspoken words. You have been so optimistic and yet I have accomplished more than you.

Yes, I will give you that my husband and best friend. You have done more, but there is a reason to think wonderful, imaginative, deliriously spinning thoughts.

It increases the pleasure you experience on a daily basis. You were made to enjoy life! Your senses were not created for the average experience. Your taste buds can taste the difference between a bland piece of toast and a colorful meal with filet mignon, sauces, mushrooms, onions and garlic. Your ears can hear the sweet singing on a bird and the rumble of the car next to you. Your fingers can enjoy the softness of someone's skin or the roughness of pavement.

It is your choice whether you choose to enjoy these sensations. And the choosing will change your life. Decide to taste amazing food. Make a point of looking to the left of the highway and seeing the fiery colors of the fall trees. Fill your lungs to bursting and then let it out with relief. Look at your old pictures and remember the joy of a life you have lived.

And enjoy every bit of success and love that comes your way. I promise, what you think does matter. It will be the difference between a life enjoyed and an existence tolerated.

I hope you choose the first!

For more encouragement go to http://www.neadinspiration.com/ or call Liz at 515-664-6881.

Power Comes From Within

Power Comes From Within

Birds of a Feather, fly together. I'm sure you have heard this one. You are who you are with. Yes, those people you spend the most time with influence. It might be true that your income is the average of the seven people with you spend the most time. But your power comes from within.

Your power: Your Game. It's the something that makes you, well, YOU. It's the power to solve problems, remove barriers, make big things happen, make little things happen. It's the manipulation and desire and effort that you exert to change something to get a little better or a little worse.

You might be looking for a job. You might be building your business. You are looking for a healthy mate. You are looking for a healthy you. Your power does not come from your prospective employer, from your prospective clients, your future lover or the scale. It comes from your ability to bring YOU to the table. The best, most productive, creative, healthy YOU to the job interview, to your client, on your date, to your workout.

Outside of you there is guidance. Support. Mentorship. Discouragement. Barriers. Happenstances. But the power of what you will do, well, that will come from the inside. Today, look around. And instead of wondering who is going to make your day, decide how you will make this day the best possible day for yourself. Using your personal power.

Imagine If!

Imagine If!

Before I embarked on this journey, my mind produced a million reasons why "it" wasn't happening for me. I didn't have enough money. I didn't enjoy the support at home. I had made too many mistakes. I didn't possess the experience necessary for that kind of success. My picture of success was drawn by someone else's experience, which was whatever they had that I didn't have helped me understand what I would want.

Today I am heading towards everything I have ever wanted. I am no longer at the starting gate, wondering when the gun will go off. I am not on the track, running a race that I don't want to run. I am in this experience and it is the experience that I want to have. I wouldn't trade it for anything else. I didn't win the lottery. I have no more or less support than I ever did. In fact, I think that I misread the level of support that I did have. I have a bit more experience due to my efforts, but no degree or brilliant moment that I thought I would need to before beginning the journey. My mistakes continue to pile up as that is the state of the human condition.

Nothing is really different except for one thing. I am using my imagination. Human beings are the only beings that have this ability, this gift of imagination. We can utilize other people's experiences, our own experiences, the images gifted us in books and movies and television shows and we can conjure up the possibilities as if they are happening right now.

What do you imagine? Is it a life that has a very small possibility of the success that you want? Is your imagination hamstrung with a bevy or rules of can nots and will nots and mayby nots? Or do you imagine the life that you want. Do you utilize your mind's eye to bring forward the colors and feelings and even smells of what it will be when you reach the reality of the vision that you desire?

Take some time to imagine what you want. If you don't have the experiences to draw on to support your vision, then ask others who stand in the place you desire. Read and watch and ask for any information that can support your imagination and use that ability to create a scene for the future to bring the future closer to today.

Once I stepped out in faith and began to do what I was meant to do, the future transformed from a distant mirage into moments that I can see and feel and touch. What was once just in my head, I wanted to be a speaker, I wanted to be an influencer, I wanted to be an inspirer, is now my daily existence. Instead of wishing that I could have something that doesn't feel attainable, I am now charged with figuring out how to keep the momentum going.

So today I want you to imagine. Imagine it all in vivid color. Keep imagining and keep asking. You might be suprised and what leaps to life.

Let Liz Nead inspire you further. Purchase her CD's- the 1440 Principle, Finding Your Game, Creating Your Vision and Building a Rockstar Network on http://www.neadinspiration.com/.

Vision Board #3: My Best Work Yet!

Vision Board #3: My Best Work Yet!

I created my third vision board today. I can't wait to see what happens next.

The first one was created to disprove the process of creating vision on a silly posterboard with ridiculous pictures. I slapped up pictures of things I never thought would happen. Then I was knocked off the throne of skeptism as each picture miraculously came to life.

The second time, I created a vision board based on what I thought I should want. Things that would look good for a speaker who preaches about vision.

The third one is the best. It has my heart. Everything I could ever want or need from the deepest part of who I am. This time it's different. Although my experience with vision boards Disparate from anything I have ever experienced.

• The Truth: As I said, Vision Board #3 is my heart. It is coming from a place of yearning and wanting. I know that I will be heartbroken if some of these things don't come to pass. Yet, as I thought about the pictures and what I wanted, how to write it out and let the images speak for my heart, I asked my self one thing. Why would I want to depict anything else? If ever there was a place to inject my heart, this would be it.


• No Spectators Allowed: I'm a speaker, so I tend to view life from a stage. What do I look like? Who will see me? How will this be perceived? These are all very insightful questions in developing a career, but this insight is the great ravager of vision. Vision Board #3 is just for me. In fact, I might be a bit embarrased for you to have such a clear view into me. As I placed phrases and images on my board, I put aside the thoughts of you. If it is to work the way I want it, it had to be for me.


• Feelings First, Logic Second: It felt a bit ridiculous, cutting out pictures and using tape and glue to arrange them around the board. My husband came up to visit me during the process and did his best to be encouraging. Imagine the thoughts that flooded my mind as I created. Why you? What makes you think that is going to happen? Who are you kidding? My answer to my brain: This is what I want. I can't help it if it doesn't make sense. I can't help it if I don't deserve it. I can't stop wanting this. So it is going on the board. Vision Board #3.

I went there this time. A picture of Oprah reading my book. My face smiling from a television screen. A key unlocking the best part of my brain. Out of the box. Renew your spirit. Everything that I really want. I can see it from where I type. And I am smiling.

Five minutes after I placed Vision Board #3 on the wall, at the foot of my bed where I will see it many times in the day, my phone buzzes. More e-mails. I check the messages and find a request. I was chosen to be in a commercial. I look up at my vision board and smile.

My face on a television screen. It's already started.

Drama Free- Living! Get off the stage!

Drama Free Living! Get Off the Stage!


Drama!

I've been talking about drama lately. Have you heard this one? "Drama follows me! I don't want this! It seems to find me!"

I've got something to say about this. NO IT DOESN'T. It can't find you. But you, quite consistently and clearly, can create the same kind of drama, over and over.

Lest you think I am being judgmental, (this is one of the "dramatic" accusations I receive on a regular basis), I want you to know that I too, have this drama problem. I find myself in the darndest situations. This person is mad at me, that person doesn't understand me, I don't feel like I can tell someone else the truth. I find myself rescuing this type of person, my bank account never seems to be the right "amount," relationships that always go behind my back. The list goes on and on.

It was not about me. I was sure of it. No matter how nice I was, people were mad. No matter how hard I tried to listen, they didn't feel heard. No matter how much I divulged, they couldn't see me for who I was. No matter how hard I tried to rescue, they accused me of drowning them. I spent on what I thought was right but couldn't get it right. I protected secrets and felt exposed. How could this be? How could I give such lovely gifts to the universe and be returned such an out of balance response?

I finally had to look the mirror and admit, I invited the reponse. Drama was what I asked for and drama is what I got. I didn't wan to be normal. I didn't want every day to be the same. I liked the feeling of pent of adrenaline that comes with a problem which requires solving and I liked the moment of relive that comes with a solution even more. I felt loved when someone came to my rescue. I felt smart when I "MacGyver'ed" my way out of the situation, and I felt sane when I was around insanity.

Better than Shakespeare, is the real-life drama. It has all the makings of Academy Award, situations that MAKE you feel a certain way. The problem is, the drama will eventually get the best of you and you will become tired of it. Then, as with any good addiction, you forget about he consequences and begin to think about the chemicals that accompany drama. It's tiring, it's confusing and it's pointless.

If you don't like the drama, GET OUT OF THE PLAY! Resign as the lead! Let someone else take the stage! You don't need the drama. You need real life.

Relationships: Your core relationships, personal or professional, should be based on one primary element, Respect. If you can't be yourself, if you can't say what you need to say, if you don't remember why you are friends, then you are inviting drama. Remember the ultimate anti-drama antidote for relationships, respect.

Resources: Your resources, whether it is professional or personal capital or the money in the bank, it is only replenished by you. It can be developed only by your nurturing care. Yes, you may win the "lottery" in some way, but waiting for the lottery will only create more drama.

YOU: The most amazing component of who you are is not your hair, your athletic ability, even your intelligence. It's your SOUL. Your instincts tell you what is wrong or right, and only then can your intellect ferret out the inconsistencies. Your heart will tell you to speak and your mind will come up with some words to explain what is in the depths of who you are. Don't expect your soul to change for your circumstances or you will again create more drama.

My question to you: What kind of life do you want to live? A life that looks great on the stage, but a bit sad without the lighting and scripting of a drama? Or an existence that is marked by integrity, honesty and the joy of another day on the planet? I choose the latter. I hope you do too.

Watch for the Signs!

Watch for the Signs!

I like a good sign. A sign that "I am on the "right track."

As I go through this process, the process of going from point A to point B, I like to know that I'm not going totally in the wrong direction. Point A is the life I had before. Point B is the place I'd like to be. The line in the middle is the journey, the experiences, the lessons and the triumphs that occur between the two points.

I sincerely don't want to get to destination "B" and realize I don't really like "B," that it's not right for me and if I had recognized the signs, "C" would be have much better for me.

We all look for the signs. And as of late, I do believe we have developed a sort of faith, we call them whispers of sorts, the signs that we should take a left, a right, or turn right back around. If we are searching for financing and it seems like a struggle, we might say, "well, things shouldn't be this hard, so it must be a sign that it isn't meant to be." Or we just need to convince some people and build a team to help us get to our destination and we can't find the support we need. Another sign. Better yet, we are working and waiting for the opportunity and more doors and shutting than opening so here we are with another sign.

The desire for signs are as old as the stories in the Bible. There's a great story in the book of Judges in which Gideon wasn't sure about a mission that God called him to, and so he asked God for a sign using sheepskin. In fact he tested God twice in the story. First he said wanted the ground to be wet and the sheepskin dry in the morning and then he said he wanted the ground to be dry and sheepskin wet the day after that. A test, a sign outside of himself.

Now there are "sheepskins" everywhere. We all like to know. Avoid risk. Avoid hurt. Avoid looking stupid.

There are signs. They just arren't outside. They are inside. They are in your faith. Your belief. Your knowledge. Your talent. Your journey. Your intentions. Your fears. Your commitment. Your perserverance.

You know whether you should continue. All the whispers and shouts are there. Trust yourself and believe. Stop questioning and asking for signs and go for it. Retreat if you need to. Or put all the eggs in the basket of your choosing. Just following the signs.

Inside of you.

Hugging Before the Red Zone

I just got a hug that I didn't want.

Has that ever happened to you? You are an innocent, working quietly in a coffeeshop, focusing on your business and someone you see regularly walks toward you. You recognize him, but you don't know his name and it's too late to ask. You can expect that meaningless banter that makes you could the minutes until the conversation is over and you can get back to what you were doing in the first place.

THAT guy just walked up to me. He had already walked by once before with the usual, "hello beautiful, have you made that million bucks yet?" This was the second pass through. He came around the corner and slid his arm under mine and said something. I don't know what it was because I was thinking about something else. Should I jerk my arm away or will he move along without that non-verbal cue.

Whew. He did. But it got me thinking. About networking.

As social and in-person networking becomes more important, I think we do this to each other- ignoring boundaries and crashing through personal space. It's just harder to see these days. We get a card and without asking the owner, put the e-mail on a list. Or we laugh and try to assume some sort of relationship without during the work. Worse yet, we might go there, talking about our personal lives before the relationship can bear the weight.

I developed a rule of thumb for those of us who are just having a good time. Meaning no harm and yet, we need to remember, in the midst of our fun, we are still working at it. Developing relationships and a solid platform to achieve a vision.

The rule has three circles, one placed inside the other. Networking target practice.

The first is blue. When you walk up to someone and engage with them, you are in the blue zone if they don't push you away. It means you are going to be polite with each other while you figure out the nature of your relationships. Cards are exchanged at this point along with a very high level of information about your lives. What you do, where you live and a smattering about your personal life. You might even find out that you went to the same school or you are from the same time. May people may think at this point, 'we are connected now,' since the person accepted the link request or participated in a somewhat energetic conversation. But this is only the first step to networking. It's the blue zone. Good but nothing that will achieve results, either personally or professionally. You aren't getting invited to a breakfast club, a girl's night, or a child's birthday party. You are part of a positive experience but you are not IN.

The next circle in is green. If you have moved from blue to green, you have advanced further in the networking game. Now, the other person knows what you are about. Not only does he know what you do for a living or what your life is like personally, but they also know how, when, where, why you want to get there. The stage has been set for the next step. The opportunities have been laid out for reaction. If the other person has accepted more information in the green zone, and did not turn you away, you might get an invite to the barbeque or a referral to a colleague that might be of some use. Trust me, it takes work to get into the green zone. It's not just about creating a friendly backdrop for networking. It's also going to encompass YOU, your preparedness, your clarity of mission, your presentation, your intensity, your intention. You have to be ready to bring it when the moment is right. Remember, you are still not there. No one has said YES or NO. But it's nice. You are further along.

Last, but not least is the red zone. Decision time. It's where the relationship is solidified. You are in the know with this person. Hey! At this point, you can give that person a hug if you want, I think! And, in networking-speak, it's the moment when you ask the question. Here is a proposition, you might say, and here is how I see you in it. Are you willing to participate. You will brace yourself for the answer. If you hear no, you are going to either cruise along nursing that green relationship, waiting for another moment to work together or you are going to cool it and go back to blue. You will not stay long in the red zone. The red zone moments are for opportunists. The time is now.

As you go through your networking moments, those chance meetings on the sideline of your child's soccer game, a pass by at the local coffee shop, a shared cocktail at a networking event. Remember what you are doing. This is not the time for many casual conversation. Have purpose! Think about what you are doing and how it fits into the larger picture of your vision! Purposefully move through the blue, green and red zones as needed. Then you will never find yourself hugging someone in a coffee shop with a weird look on thier face.

Achieving "Vision" Perfection

When you set out to do something great, there is one great barrier between you and the promise land. It has many faces, many voices, but it all comes from the same place.

Perfection.

We want to be perfect. I don't mean, "be perfect." We all know that we can never truly achieve perfection. There are too many factors, within ourselves and the world around us to be perfect. Not to mention perfection is subjective. Perfect to one could be absolute failure to another.

Yet, we strive for perfection. We want to set sail on our journey to creating our vision when things are right. When all the arrows point to "yes." When we have the support and situation that we need to make it happen.

And we hear every day, in a million different ways, now is not the right time. How, it is not perfect. And we believe it because we want to make that big splash, we want to hear the applause, we want to know that we did it at the right time. We are not sure if we will make it otherwise.

The voices tell us that others have done it already, and those people, with all that experience were not able to achieve it. Why should you make it when others haven't? We look in our bag of tricks and we see that we don't have enough money the bank, we don't have the buy in from others, our talent isn't in quite the right place. The timing for perfection is wrong.

Here is folks. Wait for it. The timing will never be right. The timing for the perfection you desire will never arrive.

Yet, you can achieve perfection. Vision perfection. The time is now. You are you, you have the time, you have the talent, you have the vision of a specific path. A path designed for YOU.
Don't wait for perfection. Take the chance. Fall down, get up, dust off and try again. Learn from every moment you are on the planet. You will be surprised at the doors that will open. You will be blown away at the serendipities and happenstances that fall into place as you dig in and produce effort to support your dreams.

Go ahead, try for vision perfection. You will find that the perfect situation, the perfect place for your talents will find you!

Five Steps to Rockstar Networking

I attended a networking event yesterday. The composition of the tables were carefully planned out, each with a tent card labeled "sales," or "IT..." The topic of inspiration was, you guessed it, "How to Build a Rockstar Network." The attendees were suprisingly ready, upper level professionals with a modicum of what they used to wear during their employment, employment that no longer existed. Apparent that they knew what to do when entering a room to network. Direct gazes, firm handshakes, to-the-point introductions.

As always, one level lower exists the truth. That pesky truth that these people had nice jobs, and incomes they could depend on. The same employer had bought the minutes of their lives for many years and they were on an unfamiliar courtship. A latent fear just below the surface, with questions and statements shot out to the universe. "Do you really want me?" "What is the secret handshake?" "I can't believe i'm in this situation."

The reality is not so stark. There is no web to detangle, no secret code to decipher. Rather it is startling simple, almost remedial. Yet in spite of the simplicity it is often overlooked. Five easy steps to building a network that a rockstar would envy.

1. Be open about yourself. The ultimate worm on a hook, personal tranparency can be transformative. Don't be the perfect version of yourself during the networking process. It's like putting a book cover on a worn book. Don't pretend you know all the answers. Learn how to be disarmingly open.

2. Be genuinely interested in others. We can spot a fake a mile away, the people who scan the crowd behind you, taking up time talking to you until someone better walks by. Instead of pretending to be interested, find the point that you are fascinated with. Figure out whether you want to have a relationship with the person that you are talking to. They will appreciate it.

3. Look for a way to help. No one will turn down useful offers of assistance. It is a great way to keep the door open until you figure out your next move. It demonstrates kindness and the effective use of some of your skills. Now, when the person repeats your name, it will be attached to service. Not bad PR.

4. Be ready to ask. Don't execute all this effort without asking for what you need when the time is right! You should know what you want, and be ready to ask the person for help if it makes sense. Don't put it off until later, you may never have this moment with this particular person again.

5. Finally, Follow up. The majority of networking bounty is lost during the follow up. Not only does it demonstrate a desire to have a meaningful relationship, but it keeps the fire lit. Do it. Within 24 to 48 hours. You will be suprised how few people actually follow up. It opens the door for YOU to make something big happen.

See? It's not that hard and it's certainly not brilliant! Just be yourself, engage in others, be helpful, ready to ask for what you need and follow up. Take this method to the breakfasts, the luncheons, the after hours events, the beach or even the farmer's market. You'll see, your inner rockstar will emerge in no time.

Vision: Preparation and Planning

Vision is a funny thing. We want something, we start to picture it and then just at the moment when our imagination gets going, something happens. A barrier rises up before us and blocks our view! Maybe the timing isn't right, you are in the wrong location, you are the wrong age, your resume is for the life you have, not the life you want.

So you stop thinking about it. It's just unlikely, so why bother? Why waste your time thinking about something that is never going to happen. Isn't that what adulthood is all about?

If you want to create a vision that will come true, if you want to stop living in fear or practicality or whatever you call it, focus on two things. Preparation and Planning.

Preparation comes from finding more out about that vision. Meet with people that have already acheived what you want. Ask them how it feels, ask them what they hate about it. Stand in their shoes for a minute and look around. Figure out what you want from the vision. Ask yourself, WHY do you really want this. Do the research in every way you can, so that your imagination has something to work with!

Then, start planning. Think of some steps that might get you there. For instance, if I want to be a talk show host, it might be beneficial for me to practice looking at that camera, an inanimate object that doesn't give me anything back! I could write out some concepts for shows. I could do the research about why an Indian chick from Minnesota might be PERFECT for the job.

If you focus on preparation and planning, if you look at that vision every day, trust me...you won't have to worry about the barriers. You will be thinking about what you found out during your preparation and your plans for the future and the the actions will fall into place!